Melange a nature

One of the best pictures I have ever taken....

Old Main

Splendour

And if I could go beyond I would.....

Eyes that speak volumes

Light in the dark

Red dot in Blue Sea

Pittsburgh by night

Flowers on grotto

Fire

Architecture

Contrast

must write

that is what my friend told me today. she thinks that i should write more. yeah! i think that i should blog more too. but my problem is that i cannot do something that i am not passionate about and the thing is that i have to be passionate about something to write it down in black or white.

i guess i could do that, charged that i am from my chat with my friend who seems to think that i have the gift. so basically what should i write about. today i visited the blog of a friend who has posted so many pictures on it and they are so beautiful. i wonder when i will be able to take pictures as well as he does. but there is the hope that one day that might be possible. but what do i say about photography.

i bought myself a painting kit and it virtually lies untouched now. why does not my mind stick with something. i am disgusted with myself. the only thing that has stuck is work which i have to do and music which i dont have to put any effort into.

oh! enough of all this fretful talks.

i am seeing this show on the travel channel on yellowstone and it is so beautiful. i would love to go there. and for that matter, it would be so nice to be able to travel to different countries. i want to visit peru, switzerland, new zealand, france, australia, greece and italy! i think that i could be happy with the above.

this travelling is something that i am determined to do and i hope that i am not detracted from this path as god help me there are so many detractors. life takes you down different paths and you wonder why this happenend and why this did not happen.

this is what i have learnt though. there is actually no point in asking why? things happen and most of the times there is no reason for them. all you can do is embrace the circumstances and move on. you can be a better person, a weaker person, a stronger person. but whatever it is, you are no longer the same. you have irrevocably changed. this is the time that you stop questioning... you just flow and let life wash over you, in whatever way it wants to.... it can be painful, it can be painless but leave its indelible mark it will...

The art of movie going!

one of the main reasons that i never liked to watch movies is that the movie makers imagination never matched up to my own vivid one. so i sometimes contemplate on why i have come to be such a movie freak. of course now i have a pick from a whole plethora of movie genres which was never available to me before. but i realize that that is really not it. my friend said that the mark of a real movie maker is one who can actually match your own imagination to deliver a product which surpasses whatever you would have envisaged that piece of work to be. but it is really not that. it is not only that i have come across good movies. but it is that i have actually given up my imagination. i realize that i am very happy to relax in front of the screen and let someone take my hand and take me through people's minds, different places, different times.

it is my own Pan's Labyrinth the difference is that it is not of my making but of somebody else's or many somebodys. i wonder what this is an indication of. I put it down to mental fatigue which has also cut down on my reading but is that the only reason.

or is it that i am bothering about a natural progression in my life where i have moved on from one form of enjoyment to another. it is just that i thought that i should put down a few lines voicing my cents on this issues which i have thought about over the past year.

and for that matter the title of the post does not match the content two a great extent. hell! who cares, i sure as hell don't!!!

dhitang dhitang bole

dhitang dhitang bole, ey madole tan tole

kar anando uchhole aakash bhore jochonaaye (2 times)

aaye chute shokole, ei matir dhora tole

aaj haansheer kolorole nuton jeebon godi aaye (2 times)

aaye re aaye, logon boye jaaye

megh gurgur kore chander shima naaye

parul bon dake champa chute aaye

bargi ra shob h(n)ake, komor bendhe aaye

aaye re aaa aaye, aaye re aaye

aaye re aaa aaye, aaye re aaye…

dhinaka nateen teena, ei baajar e pran bina
aaj shobaar milon bina emon jibon britha jaaye (2 times)

ey desh tomar amar, ei aamra bhori khamar

aar aamra godi shopon diye, shonar kamonaaye (2 times)

aaye re aaye, logon boye jaaye

megh gurgur kore chander shima naaye

parul bon dake champa chute aaye

bargi ra shob h(n)ake, komor bendhe aaye

aaye re aaa aaye, aaye re aaye

aaye re aaa aaye, aaye re aaa aaa aaye…

Pure happiness

That's what I found today. And I have to call it A divine intervention as I could have gone through life blissfully unaware of the fact that at the end of the rainbow...(ok so not quite that!) is my pot of gold... lord help me if it is the only pot.....

this puts life into perspective. so good things can happen. like one day you open up a neglected email and find that the powers that be have taken it upon themeselves to award you with a large sum of money to be used to any effect....

woah! hold it.... am not talking about the limitless capabilities of the female mind to look at every rupee or paise or cent or dollar with the gleeful expression akin to some hungry and expectant animal(can't seem to think of one which would be womanly or elegant enough) and imagine onself to be one step closer(in the limit!) to getting that oh! so gorgeous dress hanging on the racks!

i am talking real geek stuff... the incredible rush of feeling that accompanies those few words.... you have money, for books, software or a conference....

how cool is that... gosh! it sounds disturbing in black and white!!!! whatever it is, my mind is grappling with the fact that a free lunch, actually multiple free lunches and a trip to the beach..... with a conference thrown in for good measure(remember grad student!), came my way when I least expected it.

hark! oh dear lord, but you hath showered upon me the great gift of thy bounty....
and after this cry of gratitude will come the very timid prayer.... could I gave some more please....

A night under the stars

I think of myself as an old woman, sitting tired and complete in a chair with a book in my hand and thoughts in my head of one starry night a long time ago. There have been many night with stars after that but that one is special. Dont know why. Just magical it was. I think that I had received some tidings from someone who was dear to me then. And that was the day I took a turn to run outside down a side road which went winding down, behind beautiful houses and through small fields, transporting me to a different world where nothing existed except the silence, the silken touch of the cool wind, the twilight and the sound of my ragged breathing in tandem with every step of my feet on the asphalt......

I ran and I ran and there was no end. The road came to an end but still I ran. I was running for me, for what time I had, stolen away from work to indulge in this guilty pleasure. As I ran I felt cut loose.... Did my feet leave the ground? No they did not but my heart surely did. It flew out into the clear night sky to be with the stars and the full moon which all tanned and golden glowed down on me covering me in cool light of the far away and of the great beyond........ I heard rustling leaves and a few lines of poetry. I found myself on the ground gazing into the night....

And there was a fellow soul, snatching a few moments from life to enjoy the moment, for what it was. A small warp in time where nothing existed but the elements and the self. Where everything was lost and everything gained. Where nothing belonged but one felt the richest. Where everything ended.... and began again.

my two cents

my two cents for the day
i am dead beat but i so wanted to leave a post
its like leaving my mark on this world for one eternity even if that is encapsulated into 24 short hrs.....

it was a great day today: "a great day for freedom" as "They" have said. but as any other day I, found out that while u gain something every day, u lose something as well. and what i lost today is some of my patience. i hope that it replenishes itself when i set out to brave the world again at sunrise.... or way after that...

btw now is one of the rare moments when i am actually surrounded by silence. And there is music in that too. You just have to learn to hear. if you donot hear it, then learn to feel it.

Given the activity

Given the activity in the past few days, I guess I have difficulty believing that people would direct criticism and ridicule from behind the veil of anonymity. Just does not pack that big a punch and ends up bringing a smirk to the face.... and then the inevitable dismissal..

Door knob

I just looked at my door knob some time ago and thought to myself that I have not opened my front door even once today. Now that is something which is to be expected but the fact is that this is one of those times when I find immense surprise in small and extremely prosaic things like these.

But actually what I end up doing is ending up finding greater meanings in such signs. Not turning the door knob even once in a day to open the door and go out is a sign of what? Laziness, seclusion or what. I remember vividly the first lines of the movie Crash where Don Cheadle says to his partner that people are so isolated that they crash against each other if only to come in contact with them. So are we locked up in our own islands of content, discontent, complacency... what?

Have I turned into one such person. Is my not opening the door symbolic of something like this. Is that closed door a divider between two different worlds. And will I find that world if I open the door?

And what kind of world will I find? Is it a world which I will like. I like my present world. In fact sometimes I love it. But what about that other world if at all one exists? Am I missing out on something(s)? Should I open the door? And what if I did open the door and found nothing there? Or there was something but I did not see it.

How important is it to see new things in the everyday old? I know I cannot go through life without finding anything new or doing anything new. But does that mean that I have to go out of my way to find new things. A new path, a new everything.

I donot know but I guess that I am ready to look. I am ready to turn the door knob and unlock my front door..

Assignment

It is 00:58 in the morning and I'm pondering whether my breather from work should be transformed into a hasty retreat to bed. I am yet to decide on that though, hence the time to write my premier poste.... Well my French is rusty I know, but one can never be accused of trying. Hell! I may just have got the spelling right. Bunk French for the moment though, the spectacular realization I come to is that there are no more words to put down...... Is'nt that weird?! I have no problem writing pages and pages of assignments and even some original research(at least I hope so) but when it comes to putting thoughts down in black and white...... wooosh!!!! gone with the wind they are. Anyways it is surprising that I have mentioned assignments only once till date. So should I change the title to Musings... cause these few lines are nothing but that.

Okay strange fact for the day. Someone died today and they had been wrongly accused of killing their kids!!!!! Never heard of that!!!!! Just when I think that the world cannot shock me more, I witness some morsel of info which makes me think..... nothing I can only sigh.

As the first of many posts (I hope, oh! I dearly hope), this one definitely does not rank very high on literary content, nor does it give me much satisfaction in terms of a read. But is blogging not just that. Does it not let you fly free of your mindly moorings into the sky of expression where the only thing between you and liberation are few words that you choose to put down......

I am going to bed.... or am I